


A Day in the life of Vocaloid

by xLabRATx



Category: Vocaloid
Genre: Crack, Did I Mention Crack?, Everyone is of age, Meiko is drunk, Miku keeping secrets, Multi, Porn Movies, Swearing, Violent Gumi, very very tiny lime scent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-14
Updated: 2017-06-14
Packaged: 2018-11-13 23:37:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,409
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11195844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xLabRATx/pseuds/xLabRATx
Summary: It's just another average day in the Vocaloid Mansion; the sun is shining, birds are chirping, Meiko is naked on the roof...yep. Crackfic!





	A Day in the life of Vocaloid

**Author's Note:**

> Well, here's my first crackfic! Hopefully with extra crack XD  
> Comments are welcome!

One beautiful morning in the Vocaloid manor, Meiko stood upon the roof, stark naked. She screamed something vaguely about yoga and then proceeded to burn the eyes out of some poor innocent birds.

A very unfortunate IA happened to walk by the manor at this time, who promptly fainted after seeing what she would later refer to as 'the most traumatizing sight in her life'.

A little while later, at around seven, the rest of the manor's inhabitants started to wake...except Rin, who had been awake for a while, and was currently staring through the keyhole of Miku's room.

"Hehehehehehe." She chuckled evilly as she hastily wiped the drool escaping her mouth. That's when Gumi rounded the corner. She spotted Rin drooling at Miku's door and quickly walked up to her. She then wrapped her arms around Rin's neck. Rin made a weird spluttering gasp sound when she saw who it was.

"GUHMI...WHAGHT THGHE FUGHCK!?"

Gumi glared at the blonde. "Be silent and I'll let go...bitch."

When Rin stilled, Gumi removed her arms and stared at her. "So. What are you looking at?"

Rin flushed considerably, before she stood up and ran. "YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!"

The green head just ignored the screech and put her eye to the keyhole, before blushing and hastily getting to her feet.

When she went down for breakfast, Rin winked at her before saying: "I see that every morning."

Miku came down a few moments later not realising she was being stared at by two. She smiled and greeted them, along with everyone else, like normal. She then proceeded to try and force-feed Len her leek porridge, like normal. And then she changed outfit and left the manor, like normal. The blonde and greenette both wondered how she did it.

Meanwhile, Gakupo and Kaito were playing chess.

"Your go." Kaito's eyes gleamed as he stared down Gakupo.

"Hmm. I will not lose here." Gakupo stated as he played his move.

A few couches away, Luka sat reading a book, listening to their intense battle.

It wasn't long before..."Check!" Kaito declared.

"Damnit...I can't lose...h-here..." Gakupo clutched at his head dramatically; trying to think of a strategy, but he knew...this was where his final breath lay.

"Aaaaaaaannnnddd...CHECKMATE!" Kaito screamed triumphantly.

Gakupo fell to his knees. "N-no...how could this be? Am I really this pathetic?" He slowly picked up an eggplant from his hammerspace, and held it in front of him. "There is only one way to restore my lost honour...Seppuku!"

And with that he plunged the eggplant into his stomach...and died.

Actually he just fainted, but Luka applauded anyway.

A sudden crash from upstairs caused them to stop what they were doing. The subsequent screaming caused them to rush towards it.

Kaito was about to valiantly kick the bathroom door down when a very loud and very naked Meiko slammed through and ran down the hallway. They blinked for a few seconds, praying to any god out there that they didn't really see what they just saw.

Len came out of the bathroom next with a towel around his waist. "Stupid bloody Meiko FELL THROUGH THE ROOF WHILE WE WERE BATHING!"

"Um...'we'?" Luka piped up.

The blonde immediately turned a few shades darker before storming away. A few seconds later, an equally flushed Yuuma followed suit.

Gakupo broke the silence. "Well shit."

They went back downstairs.

Eventually, dinner time came around, and everyone was subjected to Miku's leek stew. Thankfully, Luka had also prepared some fish, while Kaito served ice cream. As a main dish.

Dinner was always weird.

Len and Yuuma skipped dinner that night, to no one's surprise (news had spread about the bathtub incident). Gumi and Rin watched Miku's interactions like hawks. She giggled about something with Luka, before chatting to Gakupo about something else. They were amazed. Gumi considered pestering Miku for details, but decided she didn't want the tealette to go psycho on her ass.

After dinner was mysteriously cleaned up by plot convenience, the Vocaloid group lounged about the living room, arguing about what movie they would watch.

"Okay, okay...we should watch a comedy!" cried Rin.

"Oh HELL NO we should watch a thriller." chuckled Gumi.

"No no, we need something with drama!" declared Gakupo.

"I think we should watch a romantic movie." yelled Miku.

"We should definitely watch an action." said Kaito.

"Where'sh anotha' bottlwe?" slurred Meiko.

"HEY, SHUT THE FUCK UP!" screamed Luka.

Everyone shut up.

"There's a way to make everyone happy here. We watch a movie that has ALL those things combined."

Gakupo sat upright suddenly. "My...that sounds wondrous! What film could ever be so miraculous?"

She held up a disk. "A porno."

Silence...minus Meiko's occasional giggles.

"...Okay" Was the collective response.

And so Luka pushed the disk in and plopped onto a single couch. Rin lay on the floor facing the screen, Gumi sat next to Meiko on a two-seater while Kaito, Miku, and Gakupo sat on a three-seater.

"I WANT POPCORN IN MY MOUTH!" Rin suddenly shouted.

So as the movie started to play, Gumi got up to make popcorn, which left Meiko free to wander off somewhere. No one really noticed though, because frankly they didn't give a shit anymore.

Once Gumi returned and handed out the popcorn, she noticed that 1. Rin was sleeping (that bitch), 2. Luka was the only one watching without a blush, and 3. the trio on the three-seater were snuggling under a blanket.

Said trio didn't notice Gumi's suspicious glances as they continued to 'watch' the movie. Miku smirked gently as the blue haired male next to her occasionally let out small gasps. It may have been caused by the R-18 visuals from the TV, but it was most likely because she was roughly rubbing her hand against his pants.

But who knows for sure, right?

Meanwhile Gakupo was actually watching the movie with fascination, taking notes about several things he deemed important for 'future reference'. That being said, he was not oblivious to Miku's ministrations right next to him. He smirked, thinking that he would confront her about it later.

He shuffled in his seat for a bit, painfully aware of his own *cough* 'problem' and wondered if the tealette would be nice enough to 'help' him later as well. After all, they had done so every other night.

Luka sat casually on her couch, occasionally eating popcorn. She cast an eye to her companions, and it seemed only Gakupo was truly watching the actions onscreen.

Speaking of which, why did she choose a porno movie, and why was everyone okay with it? She couldn't remember.

Anyway, Gumi was too busy glancing at them weirdly, Rin was drooling on the carpet, Miku looked distracted, and Kaito (beet-red, she noticed) kept squirming in his seat.

Luka turned her attention back to the screen, just as it started to end.

Gumi got up and stretched. "Well then, this was...fun. I'm going to sleep. Goo'night...fuckers."

So she left, but not before kicking Rin in the stomach. Why? Because why not.

Rin, being rudely woken up from her fantastic sleep, scowled. "That Gumi..." And she sauntered off.

Miku jumped up cheerfully, discreetly motioned something to Gakupo, then turned to Luka. "Well, I'm also off! Goodnight Luka, Gakupo, Kaito!"

And with that she practically skipped upstairs.

Luka sat back, pulled out a book from her hammerspace, and started reading.

Gakupo got up next, immediately positioning himself behind the couch. "Ahem. I have some...matters that I need to attend to. I bid you both farewell."

"Goodnight Gakupo." Luka half waved as she was too engrossed with her book.

Kaito lingered for a while longer, before also retiring for the night.

"I think those three are acting weirdly." Luka muttered to herself.

Upstairs, Gumi had a super complicated-ass telescope/mirror thingy pointed towards Miku's room. If someone came, she would know.

Sure enough, a dark figure dropped from the ceiling and slipped into the room.

She would recognise that long hair anywhere.

A little while later, another figure appeared and looked around, before also silently slipping inside.

She let out a chuckle. "Well, well. Miku has been keeping secrets!"

Then she frowned. "Lucky bitch."

She folded up her mirror thingy and went to bed.

And with the day coming to an end, the manor became silent.

...except Meiko was on the roof again.


End file.
